I know that sometimes one persons reality is not another persons. I know that we enter situations with different expectations, perceptions and may focus on different parts of an interaction. However, I fail to believe that every single interaction that two people have leads to a totally different reality for each person. I believe there is some rewriting of reality that goes on between the original interaction and the recollection of that interaction.
As you may have guessed this rewriting of reality is happening in my interactions with another individual (an individual who has some power over me). The thing that bugs me the most about all this is that the other persons rewriting of reality leads to the accusation that I don't have the ability to do things. That things are not done, or are not done on time because I did not have the ability to do these things on time, correctly or sometimes at all.
I fully recognize that perhaps I could be the one rewriting reality, however I have discussed these "lack of ability" accusations with other people and they recall these interactions/situations in the same way that I do. I have confirmation that were someone not standing in my way I could have easily done things on time, correctly and completely. Also, when the accuser is pressed for details about how I did not have the "ability" to these things, the tune changes and all of a sudden it's "well I did not mean you didn't have the ability." Really? Because you're exact words were "I should not have expected you to do this given that you did not know how."
These rewriting of realities are driving me crazy. They're diminishing my motivation and lowering my moral. But when you're dealing with someone who is overly sensitive, insecure and passive aggressive what the hell do you do? Besides fester in frustration that is??
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Monday, October 5, 2009
I have a 4 day work week this week, hubby and I leave Friday for grad school town. Going to grad school's football game on Sat and visiting friends/colleagues the rest of the weekend. Really looking forward to our 4 day get away. I'm sure I'll need it after my meeting tomorrow. I haven't seen some of my friends in just about a year! I am so excited to see them all.
Tomorrow is my annual review with my boss. It should be interesting. For the most part I have to let them direct the conversation so we don't go down the wrong (i.e., too sensitive to make progress) road. The one on one meetings are supposed to be a means of my boss getting feedback from everyone about how the team should be restructured.